Well, I wasn’t going to write anything on this pandemic but honestly it’s taken such a toll on me already and writing seems to help so here it goes.
After I had my son I dealt with PPA AND PPD. It was the hardest thing i’ve ever dealt with. I felt so alone, so defeated, so out of mind, body, soul. I honestly didn’t think i’d ever get better… BUT I DID. I finally got to a place where I loved myself and I felt somewhat like me again. Some days I still struggled but nothing like before.
When all of this COVID-19 began I didn’t think it would turn into what it is, being stuck in my house, having to homeschool my daughter, losing collabs, my mental health really took a toll and still is. I’m not sure how to deal with this, how to feel. As i’m sure most of you don’t either.
People are losing their jobs, not sure how they’ll make bills, or get groceries, some are having to give birth alone wearing masks. I mean this is not okay, none of it is okay. We are all losing our minds one day at a time. I’m such a homebody but I mean damn I like to leave sometimes also. I have days now when I just don’t want to get up, I don’t want to do a thing, I just cry.. I also have days when I’m just feeling great and get content, do fun stuff with the kids, make lunch and dinner, clean the entire house.
That’s the thing about mental health, you just have no control, you feel out of control, you feel lonely, you feel how you feel and it’s okay. It’s okay to have those days, it’s okay to not be okay some days, it’s okay to grieve. We deserve that.. Parties are getting canceled, trips, family time.. what isn’t canceled is sunshine, a nice cup of coffee while you watch your kids play outside.
Dont’ feel bad if you aren’t that perfect parent… That perfect parent that has it all planned out, has a schedule, does crafts everyday, makes breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday, it’s okay to not have it all together. It’s okay mama, you’re doing amazing and this will pass. We will get through this, TOGETHER.
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There’s nothing like being surrounded by others that have your back. Motherhood is hard while also trying to be the best you outside of that. I’m learning to embrace my downs days a little more because it allows me to be more human!!!
Girl, I feel you on this so much. I struggled with severe ppd after my daughter and barely remember her first 6-8mo of life. I feel myself dipping back into depression some days with my world turned upside down right now.
We’re all in this together! I’ve been doing surprisingly ok so far but not seeing friends is wearing on me ?
I’ve been doing surprisingly okay so far but I’m starting to crack, not gonna lie. I can’t wait to be surrounded by all my friends and family again soon.
This post hit home so much for me. It’s been such a hard time and this is not at all how I thought my maternity leave would be. I only have 2 months left of maternity leave, and it’s ending on such a sad note. I cannot wait to be surrounded by my family and friends again. I especially cannot wait until we can enjoy the outdoors again. Stay strong mama, you aren’t alone in this ?